#142 - Nord Versailles Walmart

Argentina to Alaska to North Versailles Walmart if this doesn't make you smile you are either dead on the inside or have some clinical aversion to excitement that Is excusable with a doctors note

(Galaxy S9)

#141 -Out of state plates

When I see someone with an out of state plate make a traffic maneuver that is even slightly unacceptable, I instantly think 'people from Wisconsin (or whatever state it is, does not matter) can't fucking drive' mainly because we in Pittsburgh are hella tribalistic, even about our generally atrocious driving. 

#140 - New Camera

I bought a new camera and it is digital and takes great photos and I am generally stoked. I got it from Bernie's on the North Side, a cool photogtaphy store that does new, used, and still develops. 

#139 - The Liberty Bridge

The Liberty Bridge was on fire and literally minutes from collapsing, and yinzers were all 'we'll have it fixed in a week. No problem.'

 

#138 - EO Meeting

In a meeting with the EO (Executive Office) when a voice on the conference speaker cuts through like a hot knife through pierogi butter and you just know dude left Pittsburgh some years ago and fought and grappled and held onto his yinzer accent like Antonio Brown holds onto the football when inches from the goal line

#137 - apple

Walking to return some items to our street parked car, I saw an older Gentlemen harvesting apples with a basket and a stick.  He looked at me. i smiled and nodded. I wanted nothing more than a fresh picked apple. He hesitated. 'Would you like an apple?' he asked. "Absolutely. I would love an apple."

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#136 - Squirrel!

Since watching 'UP!' at Dormont Park a few years ago, I yell 'SQUIRREL' when I see a squirrel. This is particlarly handy while mountain or trail biking and a squirrel is blocking your path.

During a spirited ride on Frick Park single track, I saw a tufty grey squirrel, yelled squirrel, watched him scramble up a tree, adjusted, rounded a corner, and shockingly yelled 'turtle!' as I came upon a ridge top, trail centered turtle, slowly making his (or her) way toward water.

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#135 - Greenfield Car Wash

Greenfield Car Wash

#134 - You're my wonderwall (of traffic control)

At the top of Polish Hill, stuck at the redlight about to cross (Take!) Bigelow, and the two 20 something vaguely broish dudes in the inauspicious civic in front of me start simultaneously crooning 'Wonderwall' by Oasis. Just before the second verse hits they both begin bitching about the length of the redlight in perfect synchronicity. The light turns green, the resume singing, then speed of into the distance.

 

#133 - Ardmore Boulevard

Old yinzers don't know any state road route numbers just long since retired road names, landmarks, and nicknames of roads. And will repeat some combination of the three when trying to explain directions until you understand.

'You got some good pizza aht there on Ardmore Boulevard.'
'where?'
'Ardmore. By where you work. Good pizza!'
'Rt 30?'
'I dont know. Ardmore. Up from Turtle Crick.'
'Vinnie's?'
'Yeah. That's it.'

 

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#132 - Traffic

Some days getting stuck in Pittsburgh traffic is like being awaken in the middle of the night by your 5 month old daughter:

'Ugh, Goddamnit! Not again...
OH MY GOD YOU ARE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING!'

#131 - Extreme Couponing

Scene: Giant Eagle, Homestead.

A middle aged (but young at heart!) man is checking out of the self service.  The groceries are scanned and whisked away on the conveyor belt of efficiency. 1,2,3 coupons are happily scanned then deposited into the abyss that is the self service checkout coupon disposal slot. Suddenly! The next coupon is scanned, and a red screen pops up. Not accepted! The  man scans the coupon again and again, fearing the bored, slightly agitated couple behind him will subject him to some sort of internet shaming, possibly in the form of negative Yelp reviews of his as yet unopened Hostel for cyclists. He presses the help button, the light flashes, and before one can say 'your perm smells nice, lady' an overzealous Giant Eagle employee has her card scanned, some sort of magical code punched in, and the man's coupon accepted and disposed, all while exhibiting the incredulity that only a yinzer seeing a coupon being denied can muster.

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#130 - Air Brake

A job is a job is a job but there's something kind of rad about telling yinzer old timers you work at the Air Brake* and they all know exactly where you're talking about.

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*now Wabtec. started as Westinghouse Air Brake.

#129 - Yinzer Neighbors

Pulled into my oh so luxurious S.S. carport after a particularly  long / shit day not wanting to talk to anyone asides from my wife, daughter, and a cold beer. At some point during my commute, I thought, man, I dont even know the names of my friendly across the alley from my carport yinzer neighbors. Sure enough, on the day I was craving nothing more than solitude, Joe and his wife Marlene busted out a sweet gift bag for our daughter just as soon as I they say me pull in. Their name was on the gift tag. If course. No need for a present, but we got one anywayse. Because we're neighbors.

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#128 - Jag

Scene: My very pregnant (British) wife and I are crossing the madness that is E Carson St at 7:45pm on a weeknight.
"Watch out for that jag" - Me
"Oh, was that a Jaguar?" Wife
"No. Jagoff." - Me

#127 - Port Authority Apology

A Port Authority Bus driver just apologized. APOLOGIZED.  With sincerity.

He had pulled away from a couple, believing they were getting in a car. They yelled and gave chase as theyd intended to utilize our fine transit system. He stopped, and after they boarded, said "I'm sorry"

Also he didn't run over any cyclists on the 54 route between Southside and Bloomfield and was generally polite.

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#126 - Primanti's References

The super certified teacher at our breast feeding class used proper Primanti Sandwich eating techniques as an analogy to correct child breastfeeding position.

#125 - Crumbling Infrastructure

Private property but crumbling tracks less than a mile from where a derailment happened under a week before. The mighty falling.

Our shit isn't perfect here in Pittsburgh but at least we are surrounded by those who recognize a need for infrastructure, and a host of other commie govbmnt programs, to maintain a functioning society.

#124 - Underwear Bike Ride

Joined the underwear bike ride randomly after encountering it at Market Square and letting the German in me take over.

Stripped to my skivvies and enjoyed the simplistic beauty of mostly naked yinzers riding bicycles in harmony.

Dipped and whooped and hollered up and down and around downtown, Southside, and north shore. Through the Armstrong Tunnels we were a wall of sound. Left the group at Penn Brewery to ride home, getting late for a school night.

Passed a couple yinzers cleaning the Station Square sandstone with some non-caustic cleaners 30 minutes since the underwear ride passed and they were still pontificating wildly about the 395 or so underwear clad who had rode by a short while ago.

Photo Unrelated To Underwear Ride Except Thematically.

#123 - pray for Ben and the Pens

"Don't worry about it. Just say a little prayer Ben gets a contract extension. And the Pens make the playoffs."

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/rebecca-bratspies/to-the-strangers-who-performed-cpr-on-my-partner_b_7028066.html