Monday, November 30, 2009
Skateboarding through Southside the other night,
searching for zen amongst sidewalk gaps and cracks,
a young PAT bus driver enjoying a smoke break outside Ghetto Bird
interrupted my crowded solitary endeavor with a question and a compliment.
"Nice Manual" he said between puffs and small talk.
A few minutes later, a few thousand rotations
of urethane through the gritty grime of city streets and sides
and I found myself cruising a parking lot
yanked to reality
by a woman of questionable integrity
"Can you read this?"
My cynicism said "scam" until I saw the paper
a phone number scrawled.
I read the number.
She inserted two quarters into the pay phone
which seemed written into my evening
dialed the number
"Thank you so much, hon. You're great at Skateboarding, by the way."
I smiled and skated off.
She smiled and ordered drugs.
My push was a little lighter on the way home
having given and gotten something
from the bus driver
and the city.
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Setting: Spotlight Costumes
Me, My Girlfriend, two employees.
"Why does your roomate have Nunchuks?"
"For the Zombie invasion. Duh."
(The girl at the register smiled knowingly)
It's not simply arming ourselves with blunt objects; many Pittsburghers have a detailed plan for coping with the inevitable zombie invasion.
For example, my roommate has nunchucks. I have a Pirates souvenir baseball bat. My roomate has a discreet, reliable, 1997 Chevy Lumina with everything you need to survive a zombie invasion in the trunk. My parents have food and supplies for months (a shopoholic mom and a hoarding father combine to create the ultimate Zombie survival destination.)
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Roads with a 40mph posted speed limit that are so narrow and potholed you (and the rest of traffic) cannot possibly travel over 25mph, juxtaposed with 25mph posted speed limit roads that are built like limited access highways so you (and the rest of traffic) cruise at 50+ mph.
Saturday, November 14, 2009
If people continue to believe that some dissenting opinion on global warming gives them reason to continue to drive school-bus sized SUVs and leave their lights on 23 hours a day, 364 days a year, Pittsburgh will soon be a tropical destination like Florida or the Bahamas(which will no longer exist). The occasional Polar Bear floating down the Mon on a glacier will serve to remind us how good we have it.
Note: This photo was taken with a 35mm Kodak throwaway camera. I think, in the right light, throwaways take better pics than all but the best DSLRs.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
With plans to visit friends in Columbus, OH, Saturday night, I was concerned I wouldn't make it back for the Steelers / Bengals game Sunday at 1pm. Turns out there is a Steelers bar less than 10 minutes away from where we are staying. Epic.